The eternal duck-bill power.

I bit myself--nibbling on my buttocks.

So--your dad's all imported, now?

Do you want to hear my urinated web page?

Do you have the world's most removable upright?

I'll stand here--while you hold my mushroom.

Have your a fake pickle?

Did you just _moon_ the noodles?!

What happened to my sleep?

You definitely joke dizzy.

Get me a small wetsie.

In the same conversation . . . "a six-inch wedgie." -What she was actually trying to say was "six inch _veggie_." When I asked for a "six-inch wedgie," the guy behind the counter looked a me for a half second, then said, "Okay--turn around, and bend over." -No, not really---but you have to admit! -It makes a good story.  :)

I'm waiting for the tomatoes to appear.

Like Mr. Taco--do you want to go out to the back?

. . . Then they got my member.

Watch, just there--you have a cement mark.

me: Hearing is _not_ a conscious process--your mind makes the best of what information it still receives from you ears.

A: I think your unconscious is pretty clever about that.

me: I couldn't hear what he said.

(I couldn't, too--but everyone else in the van thought that that was extremely funny. . . .)

I was eating with my eye--but then I saw some yellow poppers.

Pass the chuck brown.

I can just--go puppy.

I thought this was rat meat--but it's imitation.

I just dropped a men.

Large for butt dowels.

. . . that God would drop a hot, big croc on me.

Table likes you.

That's kind of ass-down.

I'm not going to have my car stretched at the border.

I think I had the Finnish dusted.

. . . but Wednesday is a colon day.

We saw lots of enemas.

I had the best throne--but then I had to move.

There's a lot of hairy liability, in that observation.

. . . it starts hugging memory.

You have a head thong.

She's watching your wiener.

Can the mackerel analysis accept credit cards?

When you leave for tomorrow, you're going to have to lend me the b*st*rd.

Is that the stuff that made the people hallucinating in salmon?

She [Rosie! (a dog)] has a (sic) oriental vagina.

He's one of the more voluptuous members of Congress.  (You really _don't_ want to know who.  :P )

   An update on this: Recently, I had some emergency dental surgery.  I had a tooth pulled that had abscessed/rotted up into one of my sinuses.  For the first time in _years_, I have been able to breath continuously though my right nostril; also, I haven't had a migraine headache since.  (I had been plagued by them since childhood.) I also now seem to be hearing less "nonsense phrases." This lends credence to the theory that I am going deaf from a fully preventable cause; I can't even find out for sure.  -Too bad I don't live in a civilized country--one where people who work their *sses off all their lives, can get health care.